William Wordsworth - Poetry Madness #1

I wandered lonely as a cloud (daffodils)

I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,                        5
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.                       

Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:                                  10
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.

The waves beside them danced; but they
Out-did the sparkling waves in glee:
A poet could not but be gay,                                15
In such a jocund company:
I gazed--and gazed--but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:

For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,                              20
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils.       

Reflection Walk

 

 

Took a little drive in the good ole Ford today, got lost, but finally made it to Mt. Peak in the prestigious land of Enumclaw - the pride of Washington state. More than anything, I enjoyed having an adventure by myself. I've felt really trapped lately. I find that I have a threshold for organization vs. chaos in my daily life. If my schedule tips too far to either side, the imbalance drives me crazy. The decision to walk/hike in this particular location was a last minute idea and I just went with it. I hadn't been here for years but it took me back.

Reflecting on the next part of my life, I'm nervous about the path I'm going to take (mostly the uncertainty of what path that is). Childhood has afforded me the opportunity to pursue different interests and hobbies, but I'm frightened by the commitment and responsibility I'm going to have to take for my soon to come choices. It's easy for me to make the best of a poor situation but to carry on knowing that my actions directly led to wherever I find myself scares me. At the same time though, I don't want to stop moving and I know everyone feels the same anxiety.

*insert cheesy metaphor for the mists of uncertainty that surround my future here*

 

I remember I took a picture of the same rock formation for a biology project 3 years ago. That seems like it happened so long ago. I wish I could know how I will perceive this previous year 3 years from now. For example, I remember Sophomore year as being easy going and relaxing, but I didn't think of it that way then. How am I going to remember Senior Year? That's another thing I get anxious about: not utilizing my time well. There's something wonderfully rebellious about wasting a perfectly beautiful day doing nothing. Of course, those aren't the days you remember. But is it better to enjoy the moment or have a happy past? Wow, this blog is getting really pensive. Sorry 'bout that.

 
On the lighter side, one of my new year's resolutions was to take more selfies. Life's too short right? There's also periods when I'm upset that I'm not taking enough pictures or journaling enough. They're little spells of my life with insignificant events I can't remember without some sort of written memento, and I WOULD like to remember them if possible. You forget the little things, and sometimes they make the difference. I had a club soccer coach that used to say, "Boys, tell me, is it the big things, or the little things that are going to help us win the game?" I'd always get really upset cause he'd focus on the little things and then we'd suck at the big things lol. Man I need a haircut, I mean LOOK AT THAT! What would I look like bald? Hmmm well I got that to look forward to. Actually now that I think about it, both my grandpas still have quite a lot of hair. Wow, looks like things are turning out okay for me!  

 

This format is killing me. Well anyways, thank you Mrs. Myers for the assignment. I found it very relaxing and a genuinely good time to reflect. I'm only sorry I didn't have such a profound experience as you did on your first new years walk. However, I own my hike today and I'm thankful for the time to myself. I know I don't have everything together in my life but I trust God with the rest. Is it bad to set high expectations for a year? More importantly though, is it wrong to set low expectations? Does optimism mean searching for something that might not be there, or dealing with your situation with the best attitude possible? Ooo good questions. See, this walk really did give me a lot to consider. The one thing I'm sure about though is that I'll never forget about it because the memory is saved in this blog.    :)

Sonnet 1

As time doth sleep upon thy youthful heart,

Now waging war against all tender flesh,

A slander summons none but one remark:

Tis thoughts, not age which make a man feel fresh. 

She greets him like a friendly taproom maid, 

and slips her blade within his sunken form;

Sweet liquid seeps in weary accolade,

And crown'd with jewels engraved with words forlorn. 

Yet babes know not the callow sense of he 

who weeps at chance now lost by those long cold,

Horizons fail to feign uncharted seas,

From laughing eyes, first wrench'd before made old.
      How free am I to waste what's given me,
      Whilst thou doth claim regained eternity
           

The Son's Final Appeal

  Haemon: I see today that my father has encumbered yet another issue
               But one of his own doing, my poor father of proud tongue.
               To the grave, I shall love him still, but as for his stubbornness
               May it be damned! He chooses to ignore the error of his
               Ways should his subjects see him weak, but it is his
               Obstinacy which shall break the walls of Thebes.
               For certainty, I am less fearful of the invader's blade than of
               My Father's piercing edicts. But he shall not be persuaded
               By equally inflammatory words and I must first appeal to
               Him as the humble servant that I am. "I am your son, sir," I
               Shall say, and "by your wise decisions my life is ruled, and
               Them I shall always obey. I cannot value any marriage-tie
               Above your own good guidance" (143). Perhaps my kindly
               Approach will be accepted with good favor, and he will be
               More inclined to consider the modest council of one who is
               Of lesser stature. I recognize that my dearly betrothed has
               Sparked his poor temper, so wisdom shall guide my talk of
               Her and the blessing of Athena will ease my words should
               His stubbornness prevail.
                    In this day of bloodshed, it is Reason who shall have
               Her victory, and should my father not take her side, I
               Cannot leave without speaking truthfully and openly. If my
               Kind words fail, Reason shall be my blade of choice. First,
               I will parry by adding, "Father, there is nothing I can prize
               Above your happiness and well-being. What greater good
               Could a son desire," but my lunge shall be "surely, to think
               Your own the only wisdom, and yours the only word, the
               Only will, betrays a shallow spirit, an empty heart" (145).
               Truly will my sword pierce his heart of logic or it shall sever
               Our bond forever. For between the glory of Olympus and
               The fate that lies in Hades, no crueler punishment is that than
               To live under the shadow of ignorance. My wife, may the
               Fates will her soul to the Isles of the Bless'd should her cord
               Be severed from this world forever, she buries her brother
               With honour, and I shall renounce her never. Who profits
               From my father's pigheadedness and who shall be the
               Citizen of his heart? War and betrayal have blinded him to
               The needs of the individual, and the laws which govern all
               The Heavens have been lost in his quest for glory. Ha! He'd
               Be an excellent king on a desert island! (146) Perhaps if no
               More can be said, this shall be my only pleasure in what
               Might be our last exchange. For I cannot go on living in a
               State void of morality and cursed by the gods. Should I find
               My betrothed on her deathbed, it shall be mine too, and
               We shall wonder through the mysterious fields of eternity
               Forever. But one last opportunity will my father have to
               Change his ways - I concede nothing else. Reason or Death!

ASB Woes

“Mr. Scrappy, come back!”

The team got only a glance of the black loafers as Ed ran out of the room. While the oppressive heat of the day wafted into the room, the tired paint seemed to flow down the vanilla-scented walls, dead to the world, lacking the energy to keep its place. In the sharp corner, even the plastic tree drooped it's faded green leaves to the floor. The air was moist and thick as it covered the gang in a slippery layer of perspiration. Melanie, sprawled out on the couch, desperately fanned herself with a stray leaf of paper, the notes of the day's meeting. Hanna, surviving on a minimum of her normal sleep was thrown against the wall like a limp doll, too exhausted to seek oasis in the sanctuary of the pitiful fan whispering its pathetic breeze against the backs of Dani and Madison. Sonia was God knows where; the most cunning, she had probably put a down payment on a gorgeous pool, fully equipped with a diving board and a British butler months ago. Keaton sat on Uncle Fuddrucker in the centre of the room, slipping in and out of a dull consciousness, trying desperately to recall the team's purpose for being at school in the first place.

"I think I'm going to throw up," mumbled Dani under her breath, barely capable of being understood.

"I second that," replied Madison.

"Me three," said Melanie.

The words, hardly audible to Keaton as he pictured a tall glass of lemonade before him, seemed miles away. The team had two weeks to plan for Tolo yet hardly any work had been accomplished during this hiatus caused by the recent heat wave that had hit Seattle like a wrecking ball. One might as well have asked them to clean the school rather than make any progress, the former being more likely. The recent memories of the past ASB teams seemed to offer some solace, as their events always appeared to be miraculously pulled off in the allotted amount of time.

"You're the president, Keaton, take charger!" Mr. Ed's advice from the day before floated in some random area of Keaton's delirium. His face revealed no motivation, and the team mirrored the same.

"Another day," he said to himself, "no one will be disappointed."

No sooner did he let out his last remark, a little freshman strolled past the room in her bright pink t-shirt with the Nepal mountains standing hopefully on her back. She turned sharply spotting the team in their devastating condition and offered a luminescent smile.

"Oh my gosh, are you guys planning Tolo? I'm so excited!" she excitedly burst out.

As if awakened from their slumber, the team turned slowly to the youthful voice in the doorway.

"You guys are the best! I wanna be on ASB when I'm a Senior, maybe even when I'm a Junior! Bye guys!" She rushed out of the in hot pursuit of her date which she spotted in the hallway. His quick footsteps could be heard retreating from the clicking of her heels.

Suddenly, as if a cool breeze had flown from the tip of Mt. Rainier to rejuvenate his body, Keaton jumped up from the fluffy Panda with a newfound energy in his eyes. He saw the sunshine pouring through the hallway windows and could smell the sweat autumn leaves as they danced in the wind. The soft sound of the breeze outside seemed to overpower the light clanking of the ancient fan, and he looked down at his weary comrades.

"Well what are you all doing lying down? We got work to do! Allons-y!"   

  

Personal Statement

                  When I was little, I absolutely hated jazz.

                  Of course my definition of "hate" was much different in kindergarten or second grade. I hated jazz like I hated eating new foods; like I hated wearing three layers of tight, uncomfortable clothing when I wanted to play in the snow. Jazz was that extra hour I had to sit still in church, listening to an abstract message by the preacher. It was foreign and irritating. I didn't truly understand the genre, and I hated what I didn't know.

                  I clung to the common stigma that classified jazz as outdated and irrelevant to my generation. My naive understanding of music hadn't yet spread to the complexities of jazz. As a result, I was missing out on an entire social, historical, and musical culture that was more valuable than I could have anticipated. However, as fate would have it, a childhood filled with daily piano lessons, emphatic music teachers, and a willingness to learn would set me on a path of musical discovery that ultimately fostered my desire for higher learning and a diverse lifestyle. 

                 The first jazz seed was planted by my energetic and passionate elementary music teacher, Mr. Smith. Pulling from his own prejudice, during class, he played soundtracks from films like Star Wars and Lord of the Rings; while the music was playing, he explained how a composer could tug at the emotions of an audience simply by creating a beautiful melodic contrast in the score. In his class, otherwise bland and repetitive tunes transformed into exciting and masterful pieces. 

                  Near the end of fifth grade, our high school jazz band performed for us during a surprise assembly. As the students on stage mirrored Mr. Smith's passion, I felt something tug at me inside. I wanted to be on that stage with them. Listening to the classic tunes like "In the Mood" and "Sing Sing Sing", I was hypnotized by the blend of the sound and I felt a longing to share the buzz they got as they played. 

                  That summer, Mr. Smith gave me my first jazz tunes to practice in hopes that one day I would join the band. When the desire was finally fulfilled in eighth grade, I remember that first day, sitting in the front row of the band, nervously waiting to begin. The fifty minutes that followed were filled with a freight train of color and emotions as music gushed out from the bells of the instruments. I distinctly remember my sensitive ear drums being especially sore for the remainder of the week. 

                   Five years later, I still get that feeling when I play jazz. However, I've gained something even more valuable. As I began to understand jazz theory, I also started to see these connections between my experience in band and new areas of learning I might not have otherwise understood. 

                   Recently, I've become absorbed in the realm of psychology and have begun to discover how elaborate and complicated it can be and how in many ways it relates to jazz. For example, just as a performer cannot construct the best solo without an advanced knowledge of say a blues scale, neither can a therapist help a patient if he or she does not have an in-depth understanding about the intricacies of a relationship. Jazz is like completing a complex mosaic in that, once one can comprehend the tie between the drummer and the pianist or between the baritone saxophone and the bass trombone, the overall picture becomes clearer and the music richer. In the same way, psychology must be approached from multiple angles to accomplish anything practical. I've come to see that both subjects have to be taken as comprehensive wholes, and by integrating the tools gained from one practice, a student becomes more successful in the other field of learning. In all cases, it is critical to look beyond one's understanding of the basic tune. A base knowledge is insufficient to master any significant area of higher learning. 

                     Because of jazz, I feel empowered to delve into new horizons completely foreign to me. In the future, I hope to approach the unknown with less hesitancy and to ignore the social stigmas that may hold me back from discovering a breath of knowledge that might one day become a part of my identity. Regardless of the subject, it's my dream encounter another unique genre of learning that will give me the same impassioned feeling that consumes me whenever I play jazz.   

            

Affirmations and Personality

E (11%) N (25%) T (50%) J (56%)

ENTJs have a natural tendency to marshall and direct. This may be expressed with the charm and finesse of a world leader or with the insensitivity of a cult leader. The ENTJ requires little encouragement to make a plan.

ENTJs are often "larger than life" in describing their projects or proposals. This ability may be expressed as salesmanship, story-telling facility or stand-up comedy. In combination with the natural propensity for filibuster, our hero can make it very difficult for the customer to decline.

ENTJs are decisive. They see what needs to be done, and frequently assign roles to their fellows. Few other types can equal their ability to remain resolute in conflict, sending the valiant (and often leading the charge) into the mouth of hell. When challenged, the ENTJ may by reflex become argumentative. Alternatively (s)he may unleash an icy gaze that serves notice: the ENTJ is not one to be trifled with.

Overall, the commentary is generally pretty accurate. I do want to say though that I'm pretty hesitant to put faith into anything that comes across sounding like a horoscope. You can put a variety of different bits and bobs into a personality test to make it sound unique. In addition, this particular type seems to focus on a very specific aspect of my personality, that being perhaps the most obvious part of it, so I don't find it very useful. Plus, I could have gone either way on a few of the questions anyways. I think anyone can be "persuasive" if they need to be, and I'm not sure how keen I am to agree with how one-sided and analytical this combo seems. Several of the questions dealing with emotional and sympathetic characteristics seemed to me to be too absolute. For example, (and I paraphrase) the question would be something like "do you ALWAYS sympathize with people, grow from their stories yada yada yada". Quite frankly NO! I don't always do that but that certainly doesn't mean I'm that jerk that pushes the grandma in front of the moving vehicles on the sidewalk! I might be taking my results too personally. Anyways, I embrace my results and I'm interested to see what everyone else got.

For my affirmation I got
1. Leader
2. Perceptive
3. Funny
4. Driven
5. Confident

Keaton is going to go far in life. No matter what he chooses to do, he will work at it with all his being. He could choose pretty much anything he wanted with his numerous talents. He has an appreciation of diversity and a determination to experience as much as he can in life. He has an understanding of others and an especially strong gift of encouraging and lifting up others when they need it most. With all of his achievements and talents, one may be concerned to meet a proud, stuck up character, but instead they will be pleasantly surprised to be confronted by a humble and mature individual of integrity.

Thank you so much to the people who took time out of their day to fill this out for me!